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What Makes a Flemspackle Tick?
by Jiller Elf- Published: November 28, 2012
Dolores Flemspackle and her son Phil have come to the North Pole to get the Appenapulator--the great toymaking machine of the North Pole--to use for their own company: Flemspackle Industries.
"I've never heard of heard of Flemspackle Industries," said Bernard Elf, Santa's Number One Elf. He had joined Santa, along with Gizmo Elf (who invented the Appendapulator), plus Eugene and Holly Elf, to talk to the Flemspackles about their wishes.
Also, there was a Yeti in the room. Why was there a Yeti in the room? Because no one wanted to tell the Yeti to leave.
"What sort of things do you make?" asked Bernard.
Phil Flemspackle cleared his throat. "Well, have you heard of Choco-Blok cereal?" The elves all smiled excitedly. It's well-known that elves have a sweet tooth. "Have we heard of it?" asked Eugene. "If there's one thing we elves like more than candy, it's cookies. And if there's one thing we might like more than cookies, it's Choco-Blok cereal!"
"A Block of Chocolate in Every Bowl," sighed Holly Elf, repeating the cereal's slogan.
"So Flemspackle Industries makes Choco-Block cereal?" asked Bernard.
"No..." said Phil, and the elves stopped smiling. "You know how there's a prize inside specially-marked boxes of Choco-Blok cereal" The elves smiled again.
"You mean the 'Choco-Hog The Wonder Pig' action figures?" Gizmo Elf asked excitedly? "I love them!"
"I've collected all six!" said Bernard Elf.
"Me, too!" said Eugene.
"I've got five myself," said Santa.
"They very tasty!" said the Yeti.
"So you make the toys for the cereal?" asked Gizmo.
"Umm...again, no..." said Phil. and, again, the elves stopped smiling. "Do you know the little plastic bags the toys come in?"
"Oh, I hate those bags!" said Holly Elf. "They're so hard to open. I pull, and pull, and they don't open."
"Scissors don't work, either," said Eugene.
"I have to use my drill-press on them," said Gizmo. "Very frustrating, those bags. Why do you mention them?"
Phil cleared his throat. "Because... that's what we make. We make the bags that hold the toys that are in the Choco-Blok cereal."
"But why do you make them so hard to open?" asked Bernard.
"Security!" snapped Dolores Flemspackle. "Security is the motto of Flemspackle Industries! It's the most important thing in modern business. When we close a bag--it stays closed!"
"So that's all you make? Bags that no one can open?"
Phil tugged at his collar and smiled nervously. "Well, we also made a car. The Flemmobile was the most secure car ever built. The problem was, we couldn't get inside it. "
"Security!" said Dolores again, proudly.
"I think we've taken the security thing a little too far, Mom," said Phil. "Like I said, the new thing for business is to be green. And if we use Appendapulator technology, we'll be the first company who ever made products with no pollution whatsoever!"
Phil Flemspackle has a good idea, but can Santa and the Elves help him? Keep reading The North Pole Times to find out!
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